Clueless in Car Conversations to Holding the Steering Wheel
There was a time in school when cars made me uncomfortable.
Not because I disliked them.
But because I didn't understand them.
In 11th and 12th, some of my friends could speak about cars effortlessly. Engine specs, mileage, facelifts, model years, diesel vs petrol. They had opinions, strong ones. But I had silence.
Whenever those conversations began, I slowly disappeared into the background. I nodded at the right moments. Smiled when they laughed. Pretended I understood.
Inside, I felt like I had missed a class everyone else had attended. It wasn't jealousy.
It was distance. Cars were simply not part of my world.
In my second year of college, my dad bought a second-hand car. I wasn't part of the discussion. My brother and dad handled everything. One day, it just arrived.
A 2012 Toyota Etios.
Silver.
Solid.
Quietly confident.
People used to call it "immortal"
I didn't feel dramatic emotion when it came home. No cinematic moment. But I remember feeling something subtle.
Relief.
Before that, family functions meant multiple bikes or rental cars. Now we had our own. It felt like stability had quietly parked outside our house.
Then COVID happened.
The world shut down. Streets emptied. Public transport felt uncertain. And suddenly, that second-hand Etios felt like the smartest decision my father had ever made.
Not because it was new.
Not because it was premium.
But because it was ours.
Even after we got the Etios, I wasn’t suddenly passionate.
My brother handled most of the things.
Maintenance.
Driving confidence.
Understanding the car.
I drove occasionally. But I wasn’t good. And I wasn’t excited either.
Driving didn’t give me adrenaline. It gave me mild anxiety. It actually took time before I even started enjoying it.
Something Changed in 4th Year
By the time I reached my fourth year of college, something shifted.
Not dramatically.
Just curiosity.
I started driving more. Not just our Etios. Different cars during family functions. Short trips with friends. Random opportunities where I ended up in the driver’s seat.
And that’s when I started noticing things.
Different throttle response.
Different clutch feel.
Different steering weight.
For the first time, I was observing.
Not because I wanted to prove anything.
Not because I wanted my own car.
Not because I suddenly became an enthusiast.
Just curiosity. And maybe, confidence.